Spotting the signs of domestic abuse

It is important to be alert to the signs of domestic abuse. It may or may not include physical violence and can involve any or all other forms of domestic abuse (below). Be aware that experiencing coercive and controlling behaviours may inhibit someone from revealing abuse they are experiencing.

Physical Abuse

Physical Abuse may include physical injury including broken bones, bruising, cuts, bleeding, internal injuries…that are the result of someone pushing, kicking, punching, attempting to strangle, bite etc.

Psychological Abuse

Psychological Abuse (within domestic abuse) may include isolation from family and friends, playing mind games, controlling where they go, who they see etc., constantly changing goal posts, stalking and harassment, separation anxiety (perpetrator) leading to excessive jealousy/ possessiveness, emotional blackmail, perpetrator threatening to kill or harm themselves.

Emotional Abuse

Emotional Abuse closely linked with psychological abuse, if someone is experiencing the following this would suggest that emotional/ psychological abuse is taking place:

Humiliation, constant criticism, put downs, threats to kill or harm, threats to take children, tell employer etc., constantly finding fault and being told they can’t do anything right (in the eyes of the perpetrator).

Someone experiencing emotional/ psychological abuse may present as withdrawn, low confidence, anxious and depressed, feel suicidal, disturbed cognitive functioning, unable to make decision for themselves, self-harm, excessive alcohol/ substance use (as a coping strategy), problems sleeping.

Financial Abuse

Financial Abuse - If someone is experiencing financial abuse they may be denied access to their own money (if an adult), or they may not being able to spend money on themselves or the children. Other signs include money going missing/ being stolen, the victim being prevented from getting a job by the suspected perpetrator, the victim running up debt in their name on behalf of someone else, the victim being forced to hand over money or being exploited financially (their money being taken through deception, manipulation and/ or coercion by a partner, ex-partner or family member).

Sexual Abuse

Sexual Abuse may include any sexual act or activity which they did not want to do and/ or which they did not (or were not able to) consent to, this would indicate sexual abuse has/ is taking place. Types of sexual act include rape, performing sexual acts, being degraded, sexually graphic texts, revenge porn, being made to watch pornography, ritual abuse, female genital mutilation, incest, sexual exploitation, unwanted pregnancy.

In Wales the term sexual violence is used to describe all forms of sexual abuse, including the sexual abuse of children.

Coercive Control

Coercive Control can be hard to spot. It may or may not include physical violence and can involve any or all other forms of domestic abuse identified above. However, it certainly includes psychological and emotional forms of abuse and attempts to control and manipulate the victim. It can be low level ongoing abuse which non-the-less has a long lasting emotional/ psychological impact of the person experiencing it. There is always a risk that coercive controlling behaviours can escalate into violence.

‘Honour’ based abuse

‘Honour’ based abuse can include forms of psychological, emotional, physical, sexual and financial abuse (as described previously), which can be carried out by multiple members of the family in the name of ‘honour’. Also forced marriage (not to be confused with marriages amongst individuals who have chosen to have an arranged marriage)

Click for more information on Violence Against Women, Domestic Abuse and Sexual Violence